Our adoption journey was an incredible experience. It felt like therapy to us because we had to reflect on our childhoods, our adulthood, our relationship, and how we solve issues. It was a deep and introspective process, but one that I truly valued.
Why We Chose Adoption
My decision to adopt was driven by my health. Back in 2002, I was diagnosed with soft tissue sarcoma. The doctors also found that I had an underlying condition called NF1 (Neurofibromatosis type 1), which has no cure. I was told that if I had a child biologically, there was a 50% chance they would inherit the condition. From that moment, I knew adoption was in my future.
When I met my husband, Michael in 2010, I shared my plan to adopt. In 2013, my doctors told me that IVF was an option, but we chose to leave things to chance. A year later, in 2014, Morgan was born—healthy, without NF1 and without us undergoing IVF. While I was overjoyed, I always knew adoption was still part of my journey.
We started the adoption process in 2017, but life had other plans. We had to renovate our house first, so we delayed it. By early 2019, I had started looking at adoption agencies. I found Caritas Care and was supposed to begin training in November 2019. Then, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. That put everything on hold once again.
The Adoption Process
When we were finally ready to move forward, we were excited but also a little nervous. Growing up in Cameroon, my background is different from many other adoptive parents – I grew up in a culture where fostering and helping others was normal, so adoption felt like an extension of that. I wanted to expand our family and give a child a loving home.
Matching with our daughter felt like fate. When the agency read our profiles, they noticed that I loved cooking, dancing, and singing, these are all things our daughter enjoyed too. When she first arrived, we immediately bonded over dancing in the kitchen. She would dance even without music, just like I do when I’m happy. Seeing her light up with joy was magical.
The Magical Moments
There are so many magical moments with her. The first time she danced in the kitchen with me, the way her eyes crinkle when she smiles, the way she tries every kind of food with enthusiasm, she’s brought so much laughter and love into our home. She’s independent, full of energy, and always ready to try new things. Watching Morgan step into the role of a big brother so naturally has been heart-warming. He looks out for her, plays with her, and guides her. It’s beautiful to see.
Challenges and Support
Honestly, I don’t dwell on challenges. I have always been optimistic, and I try to turn every challenge into an opportunity. But I know that if we ever need support, Caritas Care is always there for us. The training and preparation they provided were invaluable. At first, Michael and I thought, “We already have a child, what more could they teach us?” But we learned so much, especially about therapeutic parenting. Even though we were already doing some of it naturally, it was helpful to put a name to those strategies and fully understand them.
Our Advice for Future Adopters
I always encourage people to keep an open mind about adoption. I’ve spoken to many people who were hesitant or worried about barriers, but I always tell them that adoption agencies want to help you build a family. They will support and guide you through the process.
If you’re thinking about adopting, just go for it. You don’t need to be perfect; you just need to be willing to love and care for a child. Adoption is about providing a home, love, and security and there’s no greater gift than that!
We feel fulfilled as a family, but I know this isn’t the end of our journey. I would love to adopt again in the future. We have so much love to give, and I know our journey isn’t over yet.
Elmina and Michael
To make an enquiry call us on 0800 652 6955, complete the enquiry form on this page or attend one of our Adoption information events
