Why is it so important for brothers and sisters to stay together when in foster care?
At Caritas Care we often receive referrals from Local Authorities to request families to care for brothers and sisters together. Wherever possible and if this has been agreed to be in the best interests of the child, this will be a priority. Sometimes they may need to live in separate homes for various reasons, however if at all possible a local authority will help them to remain together.
It may prove difficult to keep them together where they have a large number of brothers and sisters. In these circumstances, local authorities will try to put children into families who live close together and will make it a priority to make sure that the children can remain in touch. This may be in person, meeting up for play dates and sometimes visiting the homes of the families where their brothers and sisters are living. This may help ease their worries and help them to feel less anxious about this.
If they are worried about where their brothers and sisters are, this may make it difficult for them to form bonds within a fostering family.
There are many strengths and benefits found from keeping brothers and sisters together. Some of these are:
- They settle better into their new surroundings, knowing that they have each other.
- They are able to comfort each other during a very emotional and difficult time.
- It provides a sense of identity and belonging.
- The relationship is strengthened between brothers and sisters and no matter where their journey takes them, they can support each other into adulthood.
Some questions regarding brothers and sisters remaining together:
When might it be better for the child to live separately for a while?
When a child has had to be the caregiver to their brother or sister, they may find it difficult for an adult to take over this role. They may sometimes need to be given the chance to return to being a child themselves and to allow adult carers to meet the needs of their brother or sister.
Some children find it difficult to separate from shared traumatic experiences when living with a brother or sister who has experienced the same. By living together they can sometimes be re-traumatised.
Do they need to have their own rooms?
Ideally children would need to have their own bedrooms especially if they are of school age.
A local authority will always consider these factors when deciding what is in the child’s best interest in relation to whether it is recommended that they live, together or apart.
If you have more than one spare room and you feel that you could support a group of brothers and sisters you would be offered support and guidance. This is very rewarding when you have been able to offer brothers and sisters any opportunity to remain together.
